


Intersections

by Buttercup_ghost



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Child Abandonment, Depression, Emotional Hurt, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Emotionally Repressed, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, i guess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-08
Updated: 2017-04-18
Packaged: 2018-10-16 05:40:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10564743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Buttercup_ghost/pseuds/Buttercup_ghost
Summary: Lives connect, and peoples personalities domino, until you're you.Is there even a you?You don't know anymore.It's all just nonsense.





	1. If kindess is weakness; be cruel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And if it's not, then what have you been doing tell this point?

"What do you _mean?_ "

She sounds angry, confused, as if she didn't expect this from _her_ , of all people. As if it doesn't fit the picture of her, and it makes her frustrated. Chloe winces, it's probably fair, but she still feels the sting. Bringing her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them, creating a place to nestle her head, she repeats again, in a almost fragile tone— _almost_ , because Chloe bergese is not fragile. She **can't** be.

"How do you be honest? How do you— how are you so... _free?_ "

And she hates how pathetic she sounds— weak. She doesn't know how to lower her walls like this, how to keep the facade of the sharp tongued brat she knows she probably is— doesn't know how to be open without getting hurt. Everyone always hurt you in the end—it was better not to love at all. But she's to tired to keep the walls up, so she lets them crumble down, crushing her.

"I love you, you know. In a shallow way. Like I do everything. I love how you appear strong–– perfect. I wish I could fly, like how you do, jumping away with a smile."

She was speechless, looking closely at this bully-- at a kid who was responsible for half of the akuma attacks alone, and was a target of most. How does it feel to have that reputation? To have people hate you for it? Attack you for it? _Why in the world would one continue doing it?_

  
[To be strong, of course. Because if love is just going to hurt you in the end it's better to be hated.]

"You're everything I'm not; kind, strong, intelligent. You don't hurt people, push away, or downplay affection. You know– you know how to show it right, you know how to be _kind_."

Maybe it was unnecessary, but Chloe couldn't help but let it out. She'd been bottling it up— and now it was rushing out in a frustrated huff.

"You're— how can you do it?! Doesn't it hurt? Isn't it scary?! So _why–?!_ "

And she's angry now, less at ladybug and more at herself, face contorting and arms waving, leaning forward as if ladybugs kindness and strength could rub off, calm her down, if only she was closer.

"Why the _fuck_ would you— how can you— kindness only gets you hurt in the end! It's weakness!"

And it's true, she thinks, it is weakness-- it's only ever gotten her hurt, being kind. So it's better to be cruel, isn't it? That's how you're strong, that's how you won't be hurt. So why was she still in pain? No one could hurt her anymore, her father owned this city, and everyone in it, and she owned her dad. She should be powerful, strong, fearless. Kindness is only weakness so why....

_"Why are you so much stronger than me?!"_


	2. Don't get close to people; everyone leaves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They will always, always, leave.  
> That's the only constant in life.

When she is alone once again, a confused ladybug looking as if Chloe had just shattered her world view hoping out the window, she collapses, and cries. The walls she built around her are long gone, the rumble of them crushing her heart beneath their weight. And it burst forward, in sobs that wrack her body as she buries her head in her hands.

For the first time since her mom left her, Chloe allows herself to cry.

She is weak. She knows this, today has proved it, all her desperate attempts at being strong failing. Her emotions she shouldn't have are bubbling out, all her failures rising up as if to mock her like she did to everyone else.

After her sobs die down—her dad has stopped lingering at her door, his fear over riding his so called care for her, as his hand that was hovering above the door knob moves away—she grabs one of her many phones, the one with a number that means safety in it. The one that has Adrien in it.

She clutches it like a life line, only now realizing as she looks back on her text history, she hasn't contacted him outside of school all year. She feels the gnaws of guilt in her stomach, but she pushes it down, ignoring it, trying to get her shaky breathes even and voice above the rest—because she was above the rest, she had to be, she had to be better than them, perfect, or her mom would never come back, and so she was—or as some (read: Ayla) would call it; snouty.

She wore her mean spirited narcism like armor, trying to make sure not hate nor love got through, not happiness or pain. Yet people still wormed in, somehow, as she made so called friends she knew would only leave her in the end.

It happened before— Sabrina leaving her during a group project with marionette, her cat running away from her touch, Adrien pulling away from her with each over the top advance––

..Her mom.

 

  
[designer purses don't leave, so she tries to fill the void with items. It doesn't work that well.]

She had realized that she had been blankly staring at her phone for a while now, but she couldn't find herself to care. A thought continued to echo in her mind, the very reason she pushed everyone so cruelly away in the first place, because no matter what, _no matter what—_

_Everyone always would leave her in the end._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time on what the fuck am I doing: Adrien comes in
> 
> It's three am


	3. Stop loving; if only one could

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It would be so much easier to just not care at all.

She stares at her phone blankly, for a while.

Her thoughts keep going in circles, around and around as the buzz in her ears intensifies.

Should she call him?

She wants to know—needs to know—he doesn't hate her. He worked his way in her heart, smiles and whispers under dinner tables at fancy parties, soft nights spent texting each other soothing the others worries away. But now she feels she might have ruined it— she wishes that she wasn't so weak, that she could have pushed him away in time but- but now it's to late.

She loves him.

It's a odd sort of thing, she doesn't know how to express it, so she does what her mom did. She remembers little her, desperate for those attentions her mom only seemed to give when they were in public, oppose to the coldness she gave off at home. Over exaggerated smiles and over the top displays of affection, that was what her mother taught her, how to show her love—because that's how she showed hers.

And hers couldn't have been fake.

It couldn't have been.

And she pretends she doesn't notice how he seems to shrink away from her touch, how he seems more distant from her, sighing with a almost dreamy look on his face—yet sad. How he hangs out with that dj freak, easily calling him his best friend as if _all the years they spent together meant nothing to him._ And she doesn't understand, doesn't understand _why_ that is.

What happened to them?

She used to know everything about him, not just the superficial stuff like others might, more then marionette could dream to know—and she hates that girl so much, how she pretends like she knows them when she _doesn't even have a clue_. She knew more than his schedule or fencing lessons. She knew everything.

 _Everything_.

She knew his weaknesses, his flaws, every little insecurity he kept under lock and key, lying to everyone in the world except _her_. She knew how to keep him under her thumb, how to _exploit_ him, how to secure the fact he'd never leave, never hurt her.

But now it feels like there's a whole part of him she doesn't see, can't see, _isn't allowed to see._

Dinner passes, her dad as indecisive as ever, knocking on the door with a soft _chloe?_ But not pushing any farther.

He never pushes any farther.

[He always, always hesitated. Guilt weighing him down until he couldn't even make a simple choice. He was always a coward, in the end.

He always ran when she needed him most.

He tried to 'make it up' to her she supposed, buying her every gift she'd ever need, doing everything she ever asked—demanded—like a pathetic servant to her whims. Acted as if things such as _purses_ and _clutches_ could undo what was already done. Gave her his  _pity_ and his  _guilt_ , all the while calling it _**love**_.

Sometimes she hated him for it.

Other times she believes it _is_ love, and repeats the same thing she has seen him do, like always, buying Sabrina's friendship with all its gold plated lies.

She's just her slave too. She wishes they were more sometimes.

But it's just as impossible as ladybug or adrein; perhaps even more so, because the only reason Sabrina stays is because she buys her affection.

She doesn't truly care for her, does she?]

  
Eventually she was startled out of her musings with a buzzing, vibrating from the very thing of her conundrum.

The caller ID read Adrien.

She wondered how he always knew she needed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK SO N E X T TIME ADRIEN COMES IN


	4. Don't answer anything; pretend it's ok

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fake it till you make it, right? Why would he even care anyways.

"Chloe? I uh... heard that ladybug visited you..? Are you doing ok?"

He sounds uncertain, and she would laugh if she didn't feel like she was about to cry.

"F-finally! It took you long enough!"

She tries to sound condescending, but it comes out shaky and stuttering, and she can almost _feel_ the concern coming off of him, because he hasn't seen her like this since— since her mom.

"Chloe? Are you ok?? What happened?"

It's almost a demand, but not quite, because he knows better to demand anything from Chloe. She can hear the slight panic in his voice, and the unspoken threat directed at whoever hurt her. And she wants to tell him what happened, talk to him like they used to, but what comes out is a—

"I'm fine, it's none of _your_ business."

And he's taken off guard because of course it is, he's her best friend, she's his as well, _of course_ it's his business.

"Chloe, what's wrong? _What did she say to you?"_

His tone is almost scary, but it's hostility isn't directed at her, instead at ladybug, which is odd, because he _loves_ ladybug, possibly even more then she did. She wonders why he's so upset over this anyways, he hasn't cared all year, has he?

"Nothing, it doesn't matter."

Her voice is blank, eyes far away, and he can hear it.

"Chloe, please tell me," he almost pleads, "I care for you."

That's what does it, suddenly she's mad, because why would he? Why would he care after everything?! He probably just stayed out of guilt, pity, just like her dad, he couldn't care about someone like her! She's horrible, _why would he?!_

And she realizes that she's been shouting this at him, her last question hanging in the air as Adrien stood on the other end of the phone, stunned.

She hangs up before he has the chance to speak, and curls into a ball.

 

Somewhere across town Adriens hands tighten around his phone, a dangerous tone to his voice as he whispers.

"My lady, what the _**hell**_ did you _do?_ "

**Author's Note:**

> I have no clue where this is going McFuck


End file.
